My review of the Transformers cartoons

My review of the Transformers cartoons

 

Prologue: To celebrate the 30th anniversary of this franchise, I decided to review the cartoons that I've seen. I might review the other Transformers cartoons, then again, what can I say about the Unicron Trilogy that's already been said? For those of you who don't know, Transformers is based on three different toy lines from Japan; a company called Hasbro has brought them to the U.S. Due to that, Transformers has become a well-known franchise with cartoons, movies, comic books, and video games. 

Intro: A cartoon about robots transforming into motor vehicles, I can see why this was popular in the '80s, unlike the Ninja Turtles. I'm just kidding. 

Transformers G1: This series is centered on a group of robots called Autobots from the planet Cybertron. They're looking for a power source to keep their plant stable, so they travel in space to find one. Meanwhile, another group of robots called the Decepticons ambushes them, which cause both groups to crash land on Earth four million years in the past. When they are revived in the present day, they see that Earth has plenty of resources to stabilize Cybertron, so both groups fight each other for them.

Despite this cartoon being a toy commercial, it’s not bad. I don’t mind watching this if it were on TV. I appreciate that this series isn’t repetitive, I mean, not every episode is about the two robot groups looking for Energon. This show has episodes that deal with propaganda, religion, foreshadow how bad Mr. Bay’s Transformers movies are going to be, an episode for GI Joe fans, and an episode where the Decepticons got drunk. How the creators got away with that is beyond me. The jokes in this series are not cheesy, unlike Power Rangers; however, they feel dated. I don’t get why fans are annoyed with the human characters. They help the Autobots fight the Decepticons so what’s the problem?  

Let’s talk about the Autobots

Ironhide is a hothead.

Ratchet is the team’s medical officer.

Wheeljack is one of the smartest Autobots. Sometimes his inventions bites him in the rear.

Jazz is the cool one who’s into music.

Bumblebee is the youngest and one of the smallest Autobots. I don't get why he's a fan favorite. 

The Dinobots are the Autobot's muscle.

Optimus Prime is the leader of the Autobots and not a good one. He plays favorites, makes decisions that endanger the Autobots, and when one of them wants to quit, he doesn’t encourage him to stay. In the tie-in movie, he lost Earth to the Decepticons. Congratulation Optimus! Not only are you a bad leader, but the dumbest character on this show. How can Optimus lose Earth to the Decepticons when he has more manpower? ( I'm not saying it's not possible however, it still makes him look bad.) Would fans please explain to me why they (My editor censors what I'm saying to avoid me spoiling anything.) in the movie? It hurts me to say that because he does have moments where he shines; however, they are overshadowed by the things I mentioned.

Ultra Magnus is second in command of the Autobots. Wait! I thought Ironhide was Optimus's right-hand man, and Ultra Magnus is the voice of reason. I would like to know why he didn't show up sooner? 

Hot Rod is Brash and headstrong. I like this character even though he rubs fans the wrong way. The reason why I'm fond of him is that he's the only character who has a character arc, as far as I know. 

Arcee is kind and caring. 

Spike (one of the human allies) is a typical boy.

I don’t have much to say about Sparkplug (Spike’s father) He helps repair the Autobots.

Chip is the bright human ally. The only complaint I have with him is that we don’t know what happened to him after season two? 

Now let’s talk about the Decepticons, who are the villains.

Shockwave is the guardian of Cybertron. He’s a loyal follower of Megatron.

Speaking of Megatron (leader of the Decepticons), he's a tyrant. My beef with him is that he doesn’t do much about Starscream undermining him, which ends up biting him in the butt in the movie. Also, his plans fail because he tries to multitask, and he's not good at it. Do I really have to explain why I don't like that he can transform into a gun of all things!?!  

I can see why Starscream is a fan favorite because he's the only Decepticon that stood out. (Besides Soundwave.) He may be a backstabber, but he’s ambitious. There's one episode where he came close to defeating Optimus by himself. I wish I knew why he doesn’t trust Megatron. I mean, Megatron’s plans would have worked if it weren’t for him.

Soundwave is Megatron’s adviser, and he’s arguably the most powerful Decepticon.

Galvatron is a raging madman. 

The Quintesson are manipulative; they have a history with the Autobots and Decepticons. 

One of my many problems with this cartoon is that there are too many characters; heck, all of them didn’t show up in the movie. Also, the writer could have done a better job at introducing us to these new characters. Do I really have to comment on the editing and plot holes? This series is inconsistent with the continuity this series establishes. Season 4 only has three episodes, why!?! I’m not crazy about female Autobots. We learn that new robots are created by other means, so what’s the point of having them if they don’t reproduce new life? I’m annoyed that the creators brought back a character that died in the movie, all because kids can’t deal with disappointments. (Thanks a lot, parents! If I’m wrong about why the writers brought this character back, then I stand corrected.)   

Overall, this is a solid cartoon that I think holds up fine. I would recommend this if you like cars and robots.  

  

Intro: So we have a Transformers series where the Transformers use animals to disguise their robot forms. Am I the only one who finds this disturbing?

Beast Wars: This series takes place centuries after the events of G1, the Maximals (descendants of the Autobots) and the Predacons (descendants of the Decepticons) live in peace on Cybertron since then. One day, the Predacons steal a valuable object, and the Maximals have to catch them. During their pursuit, they crash land on an unknown planet that has what the Predacons want, and that’s Energon, so the Maximals have to stop them from getting it and get off the planet. 

The premise may sound similar to Transformers G1, but it’s a step up from that. This show isn’t flooded with too many characters, and they have to deal with aliens. I like how the story progresses, and I’m impressed with how this series connects to G1. The CGI was impressive at the time, but now it’s dated. I’m shocked at how this series got away with innuendos. I appreciate that we have two episodes that show that the Maximals are not so noble. 

Let’s talk about the Maximals

Optimus Primal is a by-the-book leader. What bugs me about him is that he only got one focus episode, and that's not enough to get inside this character's head. 

Rhinox is the brains of the team and second in command. He also keeps the team level-headed.

Rattrap is the comic relief. He does the spy work for the team.

Cheetor is the youngest member of the team. His overconfidence, impulsive, and kiss-up to Optimus, I mean, look up to him. I'm fond of the character development he has in this series.

Dinobot is a Predacon who joins the Maximals because he feels betrayed by Megatron. He's ruthless and honorable. He creates an interesting dynamic for the Maximals, he second-guesses Optimus, and has a love-hate relationship with Rattrap. (To be fair, Rattrap can be annoying.) Also, he’s torn between the Maximals and Predacons as far as loyalty.

Silverbolt cracks me up because of how cheesy he is. I mean, he screams 1950s Superman.

Tigertron is a passive.

Now to the Predacons 

Megatron is hard for me to take seriously because of how goofy he is; he’s not a clown; however, he doesn’t feel threatening. He's fond of Dinobot. You’ll see what I mean when you watch this series.

Waspinator is a walking punching bag because of that. I feel sorry for him. I’m surprised that he didn’t betray Megatron, I mean, he had every reason to. It's hard to find that kind of obedience. 

Tarantulas is the bright one on his team.

Blackarachnia is smart in her own right and manipulative. 

Inferno is loyal. I’m surprised that no one fixed his programming.

Rampage is the muscle.

The biggest problem I have with this show is killing off characters. I don’t have an issue with it; it’s how it was done that is the issue. Considering the type of damage the transformers take in this series, it’s hard to tell what can or can't kill them; also, some of it was played for laughs, which makes it worse. The Predacons are another gripe I have with this series; most of them are like Starscream in their own way. The writers could have handled the plot twist in season two a lot better. The comedy can be a bit much. Season one is the weakest season out of the three because it doesn't have much of a story beyond the aliens subplot. This series did something that undermines one of the best episodes in this series. 

All in all, this is a good follow-up to G1 with better writing, characterization, and animation.  

       

Intro: Fans are right, this is the worst Transformers cartoon! What? I smiled? Darn it! I can’t say that with a straight face.  

Beast Machines: Six of the surviving Maximals return to Cybertron after the Beast Wars. Instead of getting a warm welcome, they're being hunted, they have no memory of what happened when they got there, two of them are missing, and they're dying from a virus. After being cured of the virus, they learn that Cybertron is under Megatron’s control, so the Maximals have to find their missing allies and free Cybertron from Megatron's reign.

Despite this series being underrated, I can see why fans despise it; it’s a far cry from Beast Wars as far as story, characters, and tone. This feels like an original show, but the creators put Transformers in the title so more kids can watch it. That’s understandable, I would have done the same thing. If you can look past that, this is a sequel to Beast Wars; you’ll see that this is a fine show. I like that this series has a dark story and the mysteries in this series, because doing these things gives us something different. I appreciate that Beast Wars has pay-off in this series, and it connects two of the previous series. I’m fond of how these series handle the themes they are collectivism vs free will, technology vs nature.

Optimus Primal is a mass; his ability to lead is compromised by his guilt over losing Cyberton to Megatron. Thankfully, he got over that in time, and he's more of a spiritual leader.

Cheetor is second in command and the voice of reason of the Maximals.

Rattrap is R2-D2, I mean, he fills in Rhinox’s spot on the team as far as being an inventor. My beef with him is that he lost his sense of humor; all he does is complain more than usual. Rattrap losing his ability to fight is not a big issue for me because... 

 look at him, what threat does he pose? 

    

Blackarachnia doesn’t serve much of a purpose in this series; all she does is look for one of her allies. What happened to her intelligence?

Silverbolt is the opposite of what he was in Beast Wars. To the fans who have a problem with this, let me ask you this. Do you like Batman more than Superman? If the answer is yes, then you have nothing to whine about.

Nightscream is a loner who warms up to the Maximals over time. I don’t get why fans don’t like him.    

Botanica is a scientist and passive. What annoys me about her, besides her being a transforming plant ( I wish I was high so that I could make up what I just said), is that she showed up towards the end of the series.  

Now to the villains

Megatron is more menacing than he was in Beast Wars. I don’t buy his disgust for organics.  

Jetstorm (one of Megatron’s generals) is Mr. Personality. However, he wasn't funny enough to balance the dark tone in this series. 

Tankor is like the Hulk as far as all muscles and no brains. I'm not crazy about what was done with him later on.

Thrust is cool.

My grievances with this series are that you really have to suspend your disbelief. Also, the conflict between the Maximals and Megatron is contrived; the reason why the Maximals want to bring organics to Cybertron is because the Oracle told them to. No one is going to second-guess it? Also, I’m not crazy about the designs of the technorganics; they're all over the place. This makes me want to cheer for Megatron. Plus, there's no evidence that Cybertron can support organic life and plot holes with the virus. I wish this series had done more with Cybertron.   

This may not be a good entry to the Transforms franchise, but it's a good series. I would recommend that fans give it a second viewing.  

      

Intro: WOW! Where was this level of writing when the writers were working on the Transformers movies? That’s right, the writers of this show are the same ones who wrote the Transformers movies. Either they were slacking off or they were on meth.

Transformers Prime: This series is about a group of Autobots arriving on Earth because their home planet, Cybertron, is a wasteland due to the war. They manage to keep a low profile until three kids notice them, and the Decepticons leader, Megatron, shows up. So the Autobots and Decepticons continue their war on Earth.

This series blew me away! I’m fond of the mature tone, how this show handles references to past cartoons, the creators humanize the Transformers, and the explanation of why they're on Earth. This series introduces a different kind of energon that can revive the dead. Speaking of deaths, I’m happy that characters stay dead for the most part. I appreciate that one of the Autobots died at the beginning, and the Decepticons outnumbered them 100 to 1, because this helps build suspects. (Plus, they have to deal with human threats.) Do I really have to mention how good the GCI looks? 

Let's talk about the characters

Bulkhead is friendly, lovable, and childish. 

WheelJack is like Jazz from G1 instead of what he was in G1, and he’s Blukhead’s best friend.

Ratchet is a cranky doctor and scientist.

Arcee is a lone wolf to the point where she disobeys Optimus's orders. (I'm surprised that Optimus didn't bench her from the field.) She's like this because of the trauma she when through. 

Bumblebee is the scout of the team, playful and the most developed character in this series. My gripe with him is that I wish I knew what he’s saying.

Smokescreen is arrogant in an ambitious way. He later learns humility and working with others.

Ultra Magnus is the strict second in command. There is one episode that addresses how his strictness affects the team, but nothing much comes from it.   

Optimus Prime may seem like a flat character as far as being righteous, but he isn’t; there are times where his principles are challenged. What this series did with Optimus is what I expect Superman to be in Man of Steel. Am I the only one annoyed with him being a hypocrite? I mean, he tells his team to not engage the enemy alone, but he faces Megatron alone; some explain he's setting.      

Jack (one of the human allies) is the mature one and a reluctant hero. The subplot with the girl he has a crush on went nowhere. 

Miko is a reckless tomboy.

Rafael is a tech genius.  

Agent Fowler helps provide cover and assistance for the Autobots. Despite being frustrated with them doing things to blow their cover, he’s thankful for them. Also, he says some funny things from time to time. 

Now to the Decepticons

Airachnid is sick, I mean, you have to be if you enjoy hurting people in every way, shape, or form. Also, she has a rivalry with Arcee.

Predaking is the muscle with an ego. Also, how he treats Starscream is messed up. 

Dreadwing is the honorable one kind of.

Starscream may come off as the same character as his G1 counterpart, but he isn't. Sorry, I can't get into detail without spoiling anything. Heck, you kind of feel sorry for him because of how Megatron treats him. I wish the writers would come up with a better story for him; however, that would be tricky to do without repeating what Transformers Armada did with this character. 

Knock Out is the Deceptions doctor, and he's very vain. He values his looks above everything else. What bugs me about him is that he could be fruity. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against anyone like that; however, I don't see the point of having someone like that on the show. 

Breakdown is like Bulkhead, but he isn't immature. It's hard for me to consider him a deception because he doesn't do anything wrong besides property damage. I'm having a hard time believing Bulkhead when he said he did terrible things because they have a playful rivalry. My beef with this character is that he's wasted, I mean, the creator could have done more with him.   

   

Soundwave is the communication chief, that's saying a lot because he’s the strong, silent type.

Shockwave is the smart one of the Decepticons, and he’s level-headed.

Megatron is ruthless, cruel, and egotistical. I can see why he tolerates Starscream because Starscream is a toothpick compared to him. What bothers me about him is his revelations, which make him look stupid. Also, the war could have ended sooner if he wasn't obsessed with killing Optimus himself.   

One of the many problems I have with this series is the dynamic between Optimus and Megatron; it’s becoming a cliché now. I also have issues with the plot holes, like how did things from Cybertron end up on Earth? The direct-to-video movie didn't tie up loose ends. I was let down that this show didn't go in the direction I thought it was going to go in season three. It would be interesting to see what kind of story the writers could tell if they did go in that direction. I'm annoyed that we don't have any episodes focused on what Cybertron was like before and during the war, because when we learn about the past, it makes you want to see it. 

Overall, this is one of the best Transformers cartoons that deserves all the Emmy Awards it won. If you want to see a more serious Transformers show, then this is for you.  

My rant about Father's Day

My rant about Father's Day

Three years ago, I saw something disturbing and that is Hallmark made Father’s Day cards for Mother’s. I am not kidding about that, I post one of them on this post. These cards are mainly for Black mothers, they clearly don’t have a problem with it because I haven’t seen any news report where they're outraged with Hallmark for making these cards. Not only that they take Father's day off from work the nerve. So, let me get this straight you want to be honored for not picking the right man to be your kid's father and screwing up your community? That’s what you're doing! 

I don’t get it why do women associate themselves with guy things? If a Caucasian women get tattoos she’s called a biker chick, but when a Black woman gets them, she's still considered a queen no matter what she does. How many times do I have to tell you ladies you can’t be both a Mother and a Father to your kids, it’s not possible because doing that ruins your image as a mother. Mothers are suppose to be loving and Fathers are suppose to be stern. I'm not saying mothers can't be stern, but you don't want to come off as masculine. When you do your son won't see you as a lady. If you don't want to be in a domestic violence situation with your son or want your son to turn his back on you, I would tread lightly when it comes to that. 

Also, mothers can't give their sons confirmation that their becoming men, the only thing they can do (besides giving him responsibilities.) is raise them to be the type of men they and other women would date. Sadly, American women are terrible at that because they don't value character. We all know nine times out of ten women want a man that's in shape and has money. How many of you are getting your sons memberships to the YMCA and books on economics instead of buying him Jordan's? If your son's father is a bum or criminal then you have no business telling him to be nice to women because that didn't turn you on. How do you expect your son to be the kind of man that he doesn't see and you wouldn't touch with a ten-foot pole if his father is not like that? Look at the stats 78% of men that are in jail are from a single-parent household. It doesn't matter if these kids are born in poverty or not money doesn't substitute parents. You know what having kids without a man around should be considered child neglect, I mean it’s not fair that kids have to grow up with no father around. 

Who's going to warn your son about the disadvantages he's going to have for being a man, heck being raised in a single-parent household is a disadvantage. I mean how are mothers going to help their sons with guys' stuff if they can't or won't do those things? For example, If I ask boys to build something out of Legos or create a map in Halo, I bet you nine times out of ten they will have a hard time with that. Also, they will pick up on feminine features, for example, how do you expect your son to take out the trash if you think it's disgusting? Also, whenever your son shows signs of masculinity you frown upon it. For example, how many men don't like the idea of having a gun in the house because of their mother? Since we're on the subject of guns how do single mothers expect to protect their kids if they don't want to carry any weapons? 

I have mixed feelings about my father not being in my life, on one hand, I wish he was around and on the other hand, I'm kind of glad he isn't. What's the point of having a father if our competitive nature will come between us? This is why boys and men are more rebellious because we are not followers. For the most part, we follow not because we trust who's in charge, it's because we can't overthrow who's in charge. Fathers are not excluded from this; domestic violence wouldn't exist if that wasn't the case. If you are not OK with your son turning his back on your or leaving you for dead, then we have to do a better job finding a middle ground.       

Also, I'm having a hard time resolving my differences with my mother, I will have a harder time with him because like I said fathers are stern. I understand fathers represent structure and discipline however that shouldn't be the only impression we have of them. Fathers have to reinsure that their sons still matter to them even when they are mad or disappointed with them. How can I show compassion for my fellow man if my father can't do that for me? 

This is a problem I have with my rageaholic uncle he's such a hothead to the point where I don't want to be around him. I don't expect him to put up my father's slack however he has the same responsibility as far as reinforcing the family structure. For example, both the father and uncle greet the mom with hugs and kisses, but they do it for different reasons. The father does it to show you how to treat your wife when you get married, when the uncle does it, he's showing you what loving siblings should look like. I don't recall my uncle being chummy with my mom, if he was, he didn't do it enough.  

How can I see my father as a hero, want to play catch with him, go fishing or to a football game if I don't trust him or am ashamed to be his son? Despite making a big deal about fathers there's no guarantee that things will be better for your kids if he's around. To parents who have more than one child do they all turn out the same? If the answer is no, then that's my point. Another example I've seen and heard stories of Pastor's daughters and church women having eyes for the type of boys or men who are nothing like their father. Don't get me started on girls who grow up catholic. If my father gives me the birds and bees talk, I won't be able to take him seriously because he's getting his needs met so he lost his credibility with me. 

We don't need single mothers to discredit fathers we do a fine job of that ourselves. I mean we don't reinforce or value what fathers represent. Look and Caucasian people for example, they don't take responsibility for all the crap they put Black people through during and after slavery. Does that sound like they had fathers in their lives? Hulk Hogan's son was arrested for reckless driving and Hulk Hogan beg the court to show his son mercy. If I was him, I would tell his son you made your bed you lie in it. What's the point of fathers giving kids structure and discipline if they're not consistent about it or the kids don't internalize it? Whenever a man abuses his power or gets in trouble with the law, how often do you hear them say I was wrong and I accept the consequences for my actions? I'm grateful that we don't live in a time where you have to do dangerous things to prove your manhood, like hunting or fighting a battle. Don't get me wrong I know that's considered a rite of passage however you can't have it both ways. You can't put your son in a dangerous situation and act like you have a bleeding heart when he suffers PTSD from it.        

The relationship between the mother and her son can be sick without the father. Mothers will view their sons in ways she views a husband, as far as expecting their sons to take care and protect their mothers. Doing that will put her son in a position where he oversteps his boundaries as a son and the mother will overstep his boundaries as a mother. I'm not saying sons shouldn't take care of their mothers however there should be a limit. For example, I told my mother if I become famous don't expect me to buy you a new house, car or move you to a nice arena. I might buy her a bag of skittles if I'm generous. This isn't about me not loving my mom I want to move on with my life I can't do that if I'm worried about every little problem she has. It's not my fault my mother doesn't have a retirement plan or a 401k so why should it be my burden? Another thing mothers do that can hurt the relationship between father and son is putting him in his father's shadow. 

As far as stepfathers go, Men need to stop discouraging each other from wanting to be stepfathers. I know being a stepfather comes with a lot of baggage but there is something that no one is considering. Would you rather someone take care of a woman's bastard kids instead of your tax dollars? I don't think single mothers who are widows should deal with the stigma of being single mothers because they didn't ask to be single mothers. Being a stepfather would have been better if the man that the mother is seeing wins the kids over, the mother talks to her kids about the man she's seeing becoming a father figure in his life and reinsure them that he won't come between them. 

My point is kids will have a better chance at reach their full potential if both parents are around. The media knows this without the father boys become a handful and looking for a sense of identity. We see that in Star Wars, Batman Begins, the recent Spider-Man films and T2. Because of that boys and men from single-parent homes won't be respected by those who have both parents because they can't compete with them. Also, why should we feel sorry for single mothers for choosing to be single? I hear single mothers complaining about how hard it is to do everything on their own, again why should we feel sorry for you? Last I checked there are many forms of birth control for women so what's the problem? You made your bed now sleep in it. Another thing if you keep the father away from his kids and your kids are giving you grief don't come crying to me or anyone else for that matter. I see that as karma what made you think you can remove the man from the family and not expect anything in return?  

Sadly, fathers don’t get honored as much as mothers. The only reason women have this I raise my kids by myself mentality is that they got assists. You don't hear single fathers talking about how they have to be a mother to their daughters because we can't and we don't want to be that. I bet they would stop having that mindset if we lived in a primitive society where you have to hunt for food because no woman wants to do that. If you didn't pick the right guy to be a father, then at least get him into sports or sent him to boarding school. A coach can help fill that void to a degree. You know what I’m going to give you one reason why kids must be around their father that reason is the family tree, I mean how can a child know or learn about him or herself if kids don’t know their family history? How can someone know their history if they don’t know their family? Love is another reason, men love differently than women. 

The bottom line is being a single parent doesn't give you an advantage, kids need their fathers just as much as their mothers.

 

My rant about Brotherhood

My rant about Brotherhood

Men we have a problem there is something that's keeping us from uniting (Besides our competitive nature.) and that is the affection of a woman. That’s right we put sex on a pedestal, don’t look at me like I’m crazy if you’re spending money on Playboy magazines and on strip clubs that’s what you’re doing. If that's not true then why do we brag about getting with the hottest woman and make fun of men who are virgins? I don’t know about you but I’m tired of seeing and hearing stories of best friends fighting over sleeping with each other's mom, brothers fighting over a girl. Fathers and sons fight or kill each other over the stepmom. The same thing goes for men wanting to beat up the man his wife or girlfriend cheated on him with. 

Here are some examples. 

I can’t believe we're doing this to each other over a woman. Seriously what happen to the bro code? If you're going to fight over a woman you should at least eat spinach. ( Do you know how sad it is that no one will understand that reference?) What makes this worse is that older men who are 45 or 55 are getting with 25-year-old women. I understand them wanting to hook up with a younger woman but dating and marrying them really? Would you look at a grown man funny if he ordered a happy meal at Mickey D's or playing in the kid's sandbox? If the answer is yes, then you should feel dirty getting with a woman that's the same age as your daughter. You don't think you're stepping on young men's toes by getting involved with women their age? You can hide behind 25 is not a minor technicality all you want that doesn't change the fact that it makes you look bad. Also, would you be OK with your nineteen-year-old daughter bringing home a man who's in his 40's or 50's? If the answer is no, then you shouldn't entertain the idea of getting with younger women. 

I know men want certain sexual experiences like having sex with virgins and older women because it's considered a rite of passage. However, this is something you should have done in your late teens and early twenties because women are not saving themselves for marriage these days. Getting with a woman who had many sexual partners can make you look bad. For example, let's say you met one of her exes and he asks does she still taste like Mango? How do you respond to that? When a woman turns 35, she's passed her prime. Yes! She can still look good at that age but that won't stop her from developing bad plumbing. When it comes to older women, I have limits I mean I don't mess with women who are ten years or older than my senior. 

With a few exceptions.   

Despite women outnumbering men, a lot of guys won't experience those things because they're too busy with college, girls getting knocked up at sixteen and women wanting a man who's established. This is why they are drawn to men who are 45 or 55 because that's the average age where a man peaks financially. To the men who make fun of other men who are virgins, you need to stop that because it's making you look bad. Do you want to marry a woman who's either a virgin or hasn't been with a lot of men? If the answer is yes, then how do expect to find a woman like that when you demonize men for not sleeping with random women? How can men be a womanizer if your daughter can't be a part of that? 

Pastors you need to do a better job talking to your congregation about sex if you don't want your church turned into a place where you can smash and dash. I say that because the church is the best place to find virgins. If you don't have a singles ministry, you better start one. Saving yourselves for marriage is unrealistic, I mean can you fast for years without food? If the answer is no, then that's my point. Also, sex toys would be enough and prison rape wouldn't exist if that was the case. (If you think every man in prison is gay, you're an idiot.) Sex is a biological and psychological need, you have to show your congregation some compassion when it comes to that. They should at least get a little foreplay if they have to wait years to get married.  

Women play a role in us fighting over them by not stroking the egos of productive men. If you have a reputation of dating nonproductive men, then that's what I'm talking about. Men have egos about the type of women they should get when they don't it hurts them. Would you be outraged if you didn't get a gold medal for putting on a gold medal performance at the Olympics? If the answer is yes that's how productive men feel when they don't get the type of women that bums and criminals get. If men who are doctors, lawyers and engineers don't deserve women who are drop-dead gorgeous who does? This is why men fight each other and have crimes of passion because no one enjoys paying more for less.

Women also put us in danger by treating us like her personal attack dogs. They do this by having us think were defending their honor with proxy violence. I'm not saying men shouldn't defend the honor of the women in their lives; however, if you are willing to hurt or kill someone without knowing if the situation was a misunderstanding or she's exaggerating, that shows how little we love each other. I know men don't value love, but you can't have it both ways. We can't complain about how society disregards us when we have no problem shedding the blood of our fellow man unless it's justified.              

Another way women are part of the problem is that they love to play stupid. Ladies you're going to have a hard time finding a man that doesn't want to nail you to the wall if you don't want a man like that then date a monk. This is why you have male friends, I mean they're hoping that they'll get laid or be your main squeeze over time. Don't take my word for it call him over to your house and throw yourselves at him and see what happens. Also, I shouldn’t feel like I’m walking on eggshells when I’m around a couple. I know you have to behave in a certain way where you don’t offend the Husband or boyfriend however, we don’t know what is or isn’t appropriate behavior. For example, I’m not going to be outraged with a man from Francis if he kisses both sides of my wife’s cheeks because I know that’s how they greet each other in Francis.   

Just because that’s the custom in Francis that doesn’t mean you have to be OK with it if you’re not. That’s my point just because one man is OK with you being friendly with his woman that doesn’t mean everyone else will, it’s hard to tell what’s acceptable or not if it’s not universal. If my wife accepts jewelry from a man, I will be upset with her because she’s not respecting our marriage by doing that. Really you need to have a better attitude about people hitting on your girlfriend or wife. I'm not saying that you should be happy about that however when you want to beat up anyone who does that what does that say about you? 

That kind of reaction tells me that you don’t think highly of yourself and you don’t trust your spouse. People are going to flirt with your girlfriend or wife regardless, if you think highly of yourself, you wouldn’t feel threatened by other people coming on to her. Would you feel sorry for a billionaire who gets attention from people who try to con him or her out of their money? If the answer is no, then how is this any different? You can’t get with a woman that most men find attractive and not expect other men to eyeball her. If you don’t trust her because she, did you wrong in the past then you should break it off, I know that’s hard if you two have history but trying to have a relationship with anyone that you don’t trust is harder. Sidenote when you give someone a second chance you lost the right to bring up what he or she did in the past.

Men we need to wake up and realize that women don’t have our best interest in mind heck they don’t even love us. Don’t believe me, there was a news report early this year about a man in Texas being put in jail for overpaying child support and women were not outraged by that why is that? Since we're on the subject of child support how is a man paying child support going to help better his relationship with his kids? Also, have you noticed that women say that he needs to pay child support instead of I need him to be a father to his kids? 

Here’s another example of what I’m talking about.



Do you see how women do us wrong? This woman said that her friends told her to trick her husband, the man she promise to love, honor and cherish. This woman needs better friends! I shouldn’t be surprised that Mrs. Williams and the audience are encouraging this nonsense, the women that didn’t clap didn’t condemn the other women. Yes! The Husband went back on his promise but that’s no excuse to trick him. Wait why is the wife talking to Mrs. Williams about having another kid? Why isn’t she talking to her Husband about this, hack Mrs. Williams didn’t even ask why her husband broke his promise? OK ladies since you don’t have an issue with this then you shouldn’t have a problem with Dr. Phil doing this.

A boy: Hey Dr. Phil I have been seeing this girl for 9 months now and we haven’t had sex yet. What should I do?

Dr. Phil: It’s simple force her to have sex with you, put roofies in her drink or stick a gun to her face.

I better not see women being outraged about this. Before I move on what was that thing Mrs. Williams said men have never been in control of our bodies. Then why do men have to pay for the choices you make moron!?! Ladies if you love your male counterpart then you should have no issue with doing the following.

Make a big deal about Prostate cancer, buy men gifts on Valentine Day, condemn women for falsely accusing men of crimes they didn’t commit, women taking money from a man to the point that he lives in a hotel, women abusing their power towards men, condemn Army wives for being so causal with cheating on their Husbands and women keeping their sons away from their father. Side note I kind of feel bad for Soldiers, I mean they have to come home to find out their wife is cheating on them after being mentally or physically scarred what up with that? Also, I’m surprised that no one is blaming Army wives for ruing the foundation of marriage instead of blaming Homosexuals, like I said before they seem casual with cheating on their Husbands.

There is a scene in one of the Saw films where a woman and two men that she was seeing were in a death trap, so the woman tried to convince one of the men to sacrifice themselves for her. Do you know what happened next the men sacrifice her instead of themselves. Men this is what we need to start doing, I don’t mean kill women I mean we need to let women know that you're not going to come between us. Like I said before we have to stop letting women manipulate us with their feminine wiles.


My editor: That’s hard to do.

What do you mean it’s hard? I manage to stay away from anything that reminds me of sex. That strategy is working for me kind of, I don’t buy playboy magazines or spend my money on strip clubs. Sidenote I can't believe strip clubs are a thing I mean what's the point of going there, having strippers giving you blue balls if we can't hook up? I haven’t been to the beach in twelve years and I stay inside the house during the spring and summertime. Another thing when I was in the job development program, I told them if I’m going to work with women, they have to be old enough to be my mother. 

The bottom line is we have to look out for each other and stick together. One more thing ladies if you love the men in your life then you should treat them like they’re dying. Because that’s what society is doing to men, they're killing us mentally we don't need to come home and deal with that.