My spoiler review of The Dark Knight Rises

My spoiler review of The Dark Knight Rises

Prologue: Just like The Avengers, a lot was riding on this movie because I thought this movie was going to be the first Comic Book movie trilogy where all three movies are good, but that wasn't the case. I refuse to believe that Mr. Nolan had anything to do with this movie because of how bad it turned out. I also blame myself for being disappointed because I chose to watch this movie despite the issues I've noticed in the trailers, advertisements, and people in Hollywood don’t know when to keep their mouths shut. (Thank you, Mr. Letterman and TMZ.) I normally don’t do spoiler reviews, and I was going to wait after the Oscars to see if this film gets any nominations or Oscars. I decided to talk about this now because it would be a waste of time explaining why this film doesn’t deserve any nominations, especially for best editing.

Before I rip this movie into pieces, I want to address the elephant in the room, and that is the Joker. Mr. Nolan said in one of his interviews that the Joker will not be talked about in this film, that bothers me because the Joker is the reason why this movie is at the point that it's in. I understand Mr. Ledger's death messed up his plans for this movie; however, that's no excuse for how this movie turned out. What stopped him from recasting the Joker? I know some people wouldn't like that; however, they should be understanding about it. Mr. Nolan should have written the Joker out of the movie instead of ignoring him like he never existed if this was going to be a problem. This movie ruined the characters, and I am going to go through them one by one. Before I get started, I'm going to call Bane Ubu because that's who he is. 

No. 1: Ubu I was pumped when I found out that Bane was going to be the villain, and Mr. Nolan said the reason why he picked him is that he wants an adversary that will challenge Batman both physically and mentally. Mr. Nolan described him as a monster movie bad guy with a terrific brain. Sadly, he didn’t fit that description in this movie. This bugs me because I'm tired of seeing this character get wasted. At the beginning of this movie, I thought Ubu’s mask meant something because he said no one cared who I was until I put on the mask. Later on in the film, we find out that his mask has no meaning; all it does is keep him alive. 

The movie starts off with Ubu abducting a scientist from a CIA plane. He accomplishes this by having his henchmen fly a bigger plane over them and performing a blood transfusion to fake the scientist's death. Do I really have to explain why this heist shouldn't have worked? Also, him and the main villain claim to be members of the League of Shadows, what? The League of Shadows is a group of ninjas; they don’t make public apprentices, announce their plans, and Ubu’s men don’t dress or operate like the League of Shadows. If they are the League of Shadows, they wouldn’t try to destroy Gotham City, because Ra's al Ghul wants to destroy Gotham because he believes that the city is beyond saving. Gotham was fixed between the first two films. Also, Bane was excommunicated from the League of Shadows because Ra's views him as a monster, why I don't know. So, Ubu shouldn't be trying to destroy Gotham for that reason alone. 

I'm having a hard time buying that Ubu can beat Batman for two reasons. First of all, despite Bruce’s condition, he was trained by the League of Shadows, and Ubu isn’t. In the Knightfall story, Bane did break Batman’s back, but before he did that, he put Batman through a gauntlet. During that gauntlet, Bane figures out that Bruce Wayne is Batman. After being physically and mentally drained, Bane breaks his back. In this movie, Ubu was able to beat Batman because he's bigger, and I don’t know how he figured out that Bruce Wayne is Batman. Second, Ubu's mask gives him painkillers in gas form, so he can’t control his breathing. That's like eating until you're full, going jogging, or smoking a pack of cigarettes, and then getting into a fight. This isn’t the comic book Bane, where he has venom and he becomes Juggernaut strong, plus the creators cheated with breaking Batman’s back. We don’t know if Ubu broke his back or injured it. This feels like fan service. 

After that, Ubu took him somewhere and put him in a wishing well and left him with no one watching him. He's doing this to show Bruce what despair looks like. First of all, how can this pit represent despair if there is a way to escape it? Second, the League of Shadows is not about despair; they are about restoring balance through bloodshed. Finally, we don't know how this prison works. Question how is Bruce Wayne/Batman not dead after the spinal injury, falling from the well, and getting hit in the head? Ubu tells Bruce his plan, and it makes no sense. Ubu's plan is to prove that Bruce's efforts to save Gotham have been in vain by giving the people of Gotham hope and stealing it from them. The flaw with his scheme is that Bane is making the people of Gotham think that they can survive something that he is threatening them with. 

Ubu: I'm going to stab you in the kidneys, don't worry, you will survive. 

Me: You're the one threatening me, which means you can decide if I will survive or not. 

Ubu: No! No! It's fine, you can survive this.  

Me: I'm just saying I would have a better chance at surviving if you didn't point to knife at my kidneys.

Ubu: You will survive! 

Me: OK. 

When Bane goes back to Gotham, he turns a device into a nuclear bomb with the help of a scientist he abducted at the beginning of the movie. Then Ubu makes his appearance, destroying bridges, tunnels, and other parts of Gotham. Then he becomes Hitler. I’m not joking, he gives speeches like a dictator. He shows the bomb to the people of Gotham, kills the scientist because he can disarm it, gives a speech about him claiming to be a libertarian, and releases the inmates of Gotham. OK, what's Ubu trying to do does he want to destroy Gotham or give Gotham back to the people? 

If he wants to destroy Gotham then why not just set off the bomb instead of waiting for 5 months for it to go off? How is he giving Gotham back to the people by releasing inmates and trapping the police in the sewers? If this is psychological warfare it doesn't work if you don't give people a reason to trust you. I'm not going to bother asking why isn’t Ubu an elderly man, I mean we see him in a flashback later on in the film and he's the same age in that scene as he is now. I wish the writers would leave the part out that he was part of the League of shadows because it doesn’t make him an individual villain and he has no reason to do this as we will learn later on. 

P.S. I didn't like the way he was killed off.   

No 2: Bruce Wayne/Batman 8 years have passed since The Dark Knight, and no one has seen Bruce or Batman, huh? What gives no one in Gotham thinks it's a coincidence that both Bruce and Batman have not been seen, not even Commissioner Gordon? (To be fair, he doesn't care who he is.) Come on, it's obvious that Bruce Wayne is Batman; this undermines the realism this movie claims to have. This is no different if Bruce put a sign in front of his mansion that says Hey morons, I’m Batman! The only person who figured it out is John Blake. He didn’t figure it out because both Bruce and Batman haven’t been seen; he figured it out by hiding your emotion is like wearing a mask metaphor. 

OK, first of all, if he's that good at spotting people hiding their true emotions, then why isn’t he a therapist? Second, what made him think out of everyone in Gotham that Bruce is Batman because of that metaphor? The reason why Bruce Wayne hasn’t been seen is that he's still grieving over Rachel’s death, OK, I'm not trying to be insensitive. I know it's not easy to deal with the death of a loved one; however, this is a disgrace to this character. The last film was about him learning how to deal with the hardship of being Batman. He saved Rachel more than once, and he was chased by the police, but those things didn't stop him from being Batman. Now that he has lost Rachel and Batman is a fugitive, he doesn’t care about Gotham anymore. If that's the case, then why did he become Batman in the first place? Here are a few scenarios.

Bruce: It was my plan to fix Gotham City.

Me: Then why did you stop being Batman for the past eight years? 

Bruce: Shut up!

Bruce: I don't want to be Batman because I don't want to put my loved ones in danger.

Me: Then why did you spend 7 years training to become Batman in the first place?

Bruce: Shut up!

This makes him look selfish because isolating himself like this causes him to lose his company and put Gotham in danger. This also shows that Rachel was wrong about Bruce as far as there won't be a time when he will no longer need Batman. Later on in the film, we find out that Bruce’s body is badly injured he has no cartilage in one of his knees. Mr. Nolan thinks we have only two brain cells rubbing together. How did this happen to him, I mean, he spent 8 years doing nothing, plus he was Batman for only a year or two, so how did he get badly injured? After John Blake talks to Bruce, Bruce runs into Selina Kyle and finds out about Bane; he becomes Batman again. So that's what it takes to get Bruce to become Batman again is stealing from him, our hero, ladies and gentlemen.  

After Bruce was left in the wishing well, one of the inmates was able to fix his back by hanging him on a rope and hitting his back really. This isn’t a Kung Fu movie; this also undermines the realism in this movie. I'm surprised that Bruce is taking advice from these inmates because what they have to say is not that helpful. When Bruce is having a hard time trying to escape the well, the inmates tell him that you were born in a life of privilege and you're not afraid of dying. Huh!?! What does that have to do with it? Plus, he said he is afraid of dying in the pit while his city burns, so what are they talking about? The real reason why he's having a hard time escaping is that whenever someone tries to escape the well, the inmates start chanting like they're at a soccer game. No wonder no one was able to escape this well; it would be hard for anyone to climb with all that noise. 

Speaking of chants, what they were chanting meant rises (WOW! That's really subtle of you, Mr. Nolan.) I thought this was going to be used by Ubu’s men, but no, it's used by inmates who tried to take advantage of a kid, wow. Well, we learn that this kid is the only one who was able to escape the well. I’m no expert on children, but I haven’t met a lot of kids who don’t have Acrophobia or are strong enough to climb. We also learn about what we thought was Ubu’s backstory, while Bruce is in the well, we get flashbacks of these inmates going after this kid, who we thought was Ubu, to do GOD knows what. I'm surprised that Bruce didn't make a grappling hook and get out of the well that way. Really, I can't believe the inmates didn't try to work together to get out of this prison, considering no one is watching them.  

After escaping the wishing well, Bruce returns to Gotham and stops Ubu and the bomb as Batman with the help of Selina Kyla. Wait, how did Bruce manage to get back into Gotham City before the bomb exploded when most of the entrance to Gotham is blocked and he's broke? OK, guys, I want to ask you something; would you trust a woman who steals your mom’s necklace, your car, plays a role in you losing your wealth, and sold you out to a group of mercenaries? If the answer is no, then why is Bruce so stupid in this movie!?! He has no reason to trust her; she even points this out. She sounds like my ex. Also, Bruce Wayne/Batman fakes his death by flying the bomb away from the city on the Bat and passes the Batman mantle to John Blake. 

What gives!?! This movie addresses how bad it is to lie, even if your intentions are good, and to have this movie end on a lie undermines that message. Why would Bruce choose John Blake to be the new Batman, or whoever, I mean, Bruce didn’t think this through. John Blake doesn’t have the same training Bruce had to take up the mantle, plus we don't know much about him. This movie would have ended differently if Bruce had done a background check on the main villain, who was pretending to be someone else. Plus, how did he survive the explosion? I mean, that was a nuclear bomb; he needs more than 5 seconds to get away from that kind of explosion. I know this movie is trying to give Bruce an arc of being a broken hero trying to rise above his pain to become the hero again. It's just that Bruce needs a better motivation for not being Batman; Ubu and Bruce don't have history. Also, you can tell this story without Bruce isolating himself from the world for eight years. Plus, Bruce hasn't been Batman long enough to tell that story. 

P.S. Do I really have to comment on how ridiculous it is that Batman would fight with the police in the daytime? Also, I was surprised that Bruce didn't deny that he was Batman to John Blake.  

No. 3: Alfred Despite having one tender scene, I didn't like what this movie did with this character. I don't buy that he would leave Bruce’s side the way he did; he left in the first act before anything happened. If Bruce being Batman bothers him, then why did he support him in the last two films, and why didn’t he leave when Bruce from day one? He told Bruce that he would never give up on him. What happened to that? I know this was also done in Knightfall; however, it made more sense in that story despite having an issue with it.

Alfred also plays a role in Bruce's broken state of mind. I mean, what has he done in the past eight years to get him out of this funk? Telling Bruce about the letter that Rachel chose Dent over him didn't help either because A he waited too long to tell him that, and B he burned that letter. Another thing, where did he go when Ubu was terrorizing the city? When he was at Bruce's grave, grieving, I was trying not to laugh. I'm sorry, but you can't have it both ways; you can't turn your back on him when he's vulnerable and expect me to feel your pain. OK, if I were Alfred, I would be mad at Bruce for letting me believe that he was dead because they didn’t resolve the issues that made Alfred leave. 

P.S. How did he get information on Bane? I mean, no one else knows who he is before he reveals himself. 

No. 4: Deputy Commissioner Foley Question why is he in this movie? I mean, he's just in the movie to extend the movie's run time and slow down the GPD from stopping Ubu. When Ubu tried to escape the stock exchange, and Batman showed up, Foley told every cop to go after Batman. What the fudge? This is what I'm talking about. It seems like the GPD forgot about the Joker because they're making the same mistake they did with the Joker, as far as not taking Ubu seriously. Why not spend half of the police after Batman and the other half after Ubu and his men? 

The reason why he wants the GPD to go after Batman is so that he can take credit for the capture of Harvey Dent’s murderer. I don’t understand why he keeps calling John Blake a hot head when he's giving suggestions that will move the plot faster. Is he trying to be funny? Early in the film, the GPD knew that Ubu and his men were in the sewer, besides John Blake Foley and the GPD didn’t try to get them. This guy wants to be a better Commissioner than Commissioner Gordon, but he does things that Gordon wouldn't do.

No. 5: Commissioner Gordon We see how keeping Harvey Dent looking good to the public affects Gordon. He lost his family over this lie, the lie is eating him up inside, and he's about to lose his job. I find it odd that he doesn't talk about his family. Does he miss them? What's the point of doing that if it has no payoff? After Gordon has been shot by one of Ubu’s men, he's sent to the hospital. 

In the second act of the film, he tells every cop to go into the sewers and smoke Ubu and his men out. Huh!?! Why send every cop available into the sewer? Why not send a SWAT team? What makes Ubu think that the GPD is that stupid that they would go in the sewer, like I say, it just takes a SWAT team to get them out. I’m guessing it's the drugs making him talk like that. I wish Commissioner Gordon would tell Batman to come back after Ubu holds the city Hostage. Also, how did he know the masked man's name is Ubu when no one addressed him as Ubu?    

No. 6: John Daggett This is another character that needs to be written out of the film. John Daggett is a member of Wayne Enterprise, and he's mad because the company is losing money and no one has seen Bruce Wayne in 8 years. Since he has his own Construction Company and Wayne Enterprise is losing money, he decides to work somewhere else. Wait! I'm sorry that what someone with logic would have done. Instead of doing that, he has a plan to take over Wayne's enterprise with the help of Ubu and Selina Kyle. 

OK, three things about his plan that bother me. First of all, John Daggett needs Bruce’s figure prints for this to happen, and Ubu uses his figure prints at the stock exchange to download something to make Bruce poor. One big problem with that is Bruce wasn’t at the stock exchange, and no one noticed that Bruce wasn’t at the stock exchange. Second, why wasn’t John Daggett investigated? I mean, Alfred said that he has a history of hiring Ubu. Finale Daggett is mad at the wrong person; he should be mad at Miranda Tate, she's a Wayne board member, and her clean energy project is costing the company a lot of money to the point where it's almost bankrupt. 

No. 7: The people of Gotham City How in the world did the Dent Act eliminate organized crime? You mean to tell me no one tried to fill the vacuum? I wish this movie would force on the people of Gotham, I mean, it doesn't show us how Ubu being a liberator or terrorist affects them. Yes! We get a small montage of people being thrown out there homes, partying, and being tortured, but it wasn't explored. Gotham City is like a character itself. I was hoping that Gotham's citizens would be more involved in what Ubu was doing. Also, the Gotham citizens didn't react to Ubu's speech about Harvey Dent, I mean, they didn't ask Commissioner Gordon or anyone if it's true? However, it would be a matter of he-said-she-said because it's hard to prove that, because he's dead, Gordon's family was written out of the film, and the witnesses disappeared. I wish Commissioner Gordon would disclose what Hervey did to someone. 

I was surprised that the GPD didn't get out of the sewers themselves. I mean, don't they have equipment that can help them do that? Also, Dr. Crane/Scarecrow is in this movie, but he was wasted; he's used as a judge to execute the rich citizens of Gotham. The arc in the last two films was can Gotham be saved? I thought this movie was going to continue that arc by having the people of Gotham stand up to Ubu, fighting back, and wanting Batman to be their hero. I wish the writers would come up with a better way for the people of Gotham to find out that Batman didn’t kill Harvey Dent on purpose, so that the people of Gotham can appreciate Batman for taking the fall. 

  

No. 8: Miranda Tate/Talia That’s right, Miranda is Talia al Ghul, the daughter of Ra’s al Ghul. You can't argue that this is a good twist because we didn't know Ra's had a child until now. This really gives me a headache because I don’t know who planned what. Miranda tried to see Bruce numerous times about the clean energy project, and she finally does after Daggett made Bruce broke, so Bruce made her in charge of the Wayne board and the fusion device because he's afraid that someone will turn it into a bomb. What!?! Why did Bruce build and keep a device that can be turned into a bomb and cost your company money? I know he has a fail-safe for it; however, that won't stop someone from finding it since you haven't been around for eight years. what the fudge, Bruce? 

Also, Talia could have risked Ubu and his men for abducting the doctor who could do that for nothing, because she didn’t know that Bruce still had the fusion device. After Batman beats Ubu, Miranda reveals herself as Talia and that she was the kid that escaped the pit, and Ubu protects her from the other inmates. I'm confused by her motivations because one contradicts the other. First, she said I hate my father until you killed him, then she said I will honor my father by finishing his work. OK, if Talia hates her father as she claims, why would she want to kill the man who killed her father? She should be grateful that he killed him, I mean, he did abandon her and her mother in the wishing well with a bunch of men, and her mother was murdered. 

Also, she did something that contradicts that motivation. Early in the film, after Bruce made Miranda head of Wayne Enterprises, she slept with him. Why would she do that? I would understand if she did it to drop his guard and kill him, but that didn’t happen; this is weird. Did she do this to gain his trust? That can’t be it because Bruce made her head of Wayne Enterprises. Did she do it to break his heart? No, because there's no romance between these two. Was she trying to distract us from thinking she's the real villain? No, that’s what Bane and Daggett were for. 

Either this is her way of thanking him for killing her father, or this is fan service; the reason I said that is because in the comic, Talia is one of Bruce/Batman’s love interests. I wouldn’t sleep with the man who killed my father. If I was her, I would maybe give him a medal. How did she know that Bruce killed her father? I mean, this movie doesn’t tell us if she was also excommunicated from the league of shadows or was part of that group. Like I said before, Talia and Bane don’t operate like the League of Shadows. Also, Bruce/Batman, Commissioner Gordon, and Harvey Dent, both when he was dead and alive, fix the reason why Ra’s al Ghul wants to destroy Gotham, so what did she mean by I will finish my father’s work if you hate him? 

The bottom line is that she is another character that needs to be written out of the film. I mean, if Robin isn't going to be in this franchise, why should she be in it? Hack Ra’s al Ghul’s bodyguard wasn’t in Batman Begins. Speaking of Robin John Blake's legal name is Robin, so this is how you bring Robin into this franchise without actually doing it. Screw you, Mr. Nolan or whoever came up with that. 

P.S. her death scene was terrible.  

                 

Epilogue: As far as Selina Kyle goes, I just wish she had a bigger role in the movie. Her wanting to wipe her record clean and start over is ridiculous because her record is not all digital. What is she going to do about the papers that have her records? Also, it makes no sense for her to despise the upper class because we don't see them stepping on the lower class's toes. Also, Bruce's family has a history of helping the less fortunate, so what is she talking about? I don’t think this movie is terrible, it's just the problems in this movie bugs me, especially when this movie screams rewrite and contrivances. The other gripes I have with this film are minor, like the Batcave, some of the dialogue, making Bruce seem old, more plot holes, the eight-year gap, and the spare tumbles. I thought this movie was going to have Bruce still be Batman in the 8 years that passed, instead of him sitting in Wayne Manor. Also, have him start questioning if he's making things better or worse? Then have Bane show the people of Gotham that Batman is a man, not a symbol. After that, he takes everything away from Bruce/Batman, his wealth, alias, friends, home, and his well to live. 

Bane could have expanded on what the Joker did in The Dark Knight by driving the people of Gotham crazy to the point where they want to die. He could have done this by showing them what prison life is like. From Bane's point of view, prison life is no different from civilian life. The only difference between the two is that society has better carrots and sticks. You don't know what fear is until you know what prison life is like. I also thought that Bane was going to destroyer Gotham City from the inside out when I saw the stock exchange scene in the trailers.

I thought he was going to bankrupt the city, create an EMP, release the inmates, and hold the city hostage. Also, I thought the writers were going to do something with the screenplay about class warfare; this would fit into Bane and Selina Kyle’s backstory and motivations. They both grew up in a bad and poor environment. This movie could have made us ask questions like how much money means to us, can we thrive in a survival of the fittest, or might makes right society? 

The problem with that is the movie doesn't show that Gotham has a history of a class divide. This movie could have been better if the creators had worked Selina Kyle into the story. I mean, have her do some of the things Talia was doing, as far as have Bruce invest in Salina’s project that will make the Wayne enterprise bankrupt, they develop a romance, and then have her break his heart. After Bane executes his plan, we see she has a change of heart, so she goes back to Bruce to make amends, and they try to stop Bane. If any writer can take my suggestion and build a story around them, then it could have been a great film.